Tuesday, August 02, 2011

Update: HYMN--Fear Not, O Virgin Mild

I have updated my hymn Fear Not, O Virgin Mild, which I wrote before Christmas last year. The first verse originally read as follows:

Fear not, O virgin mild—
Dear Mary, favored maid—
For you will bear the holy Child
As I have bade.
Your Child shall conquer death:
The Son of righteousness.
Rejoice, O Mary, child of faith
Forever blessed.

The re-write reads:

Fear not, O virgin mild—
Dear Mary, favored maid—
For you will bear the holy Child
For whom Eve prayed.
Your Child shall conquer death:
The Life, by all confessed.
Rejoice, O Mary, child of faith
Forever blessed.

Let me know what you think. Should I change the fourth line to "Be not afraid!" to play off the first line?

2 comments:

Robbie F. said...

I like the new 4th line. I wouldn't change it. Not sure about the 6th line. I have a possible rewrite of lines 5-6 to suggest if you're open to it.

Rev. Alan Kornacki, Jr. said...

RF--Blogger has been niggardly when it comes to comment notifications. I never noticed this comment. Do you still have any idea of what your suggestion might have been?