Monday, April 07, 2014

Wrestlemania XXX Notes

I know this isn't my usual fare, though I have warned y'all that I post on a wide variety of subjects. Anyway, I hope you'll endure it even if you're not interested. I'll only post notes here for the pay-per-view events. If you are interested, I post notes for Raw and SmackDown on my Facebook page. In any case, feel free to ignore this.

1. Pre-show: excellent four-team elimination tag match for the straps. Honestly did not expect the Usos to retain, though I have no complaints.
2. Cesaro swing...on Swagger?! After an ankle lock that Zebb halted? I thought they'd split at WMXXX, but I thought Cesaro would end up a babyface. Now? I don't know. But maybe that will all be clear after the battle royal.
3.Somehow Hulk Hogan and the 75k+ who started off in New Orleans were magically transported to Detroit! Welcome to the Silverdome, brother! Oops! The crowd was kindly about it—much better than people in Detroit would have been been had the opposite mistake happened. That’s okay. At his age, it’s a miracle he remembers how to flex!
4. STONE COLD! STONE COLD! STONE COLD!!! (Yeah, I’m such a mark. Get over it.) Seeing those two in the same ring makes a man wish this had happened 15 to 20 years ago.
5. When the Rock’s music started, the hair on my arms stood on end. (That’s no small accomplishment!) That is a whole heck of a lot of star power to open the show. That’s going to be hard to live up to. I guess this means that Stone Cold and the Rock aren’t going to be coming to Cena’s rescue.
6. I’ll say this: Triple H knows how to make an entrance. I’m glad he came down to his “Game” music instead of the “King of Kings” music.
7. The geek in my can’t help but point out how cool is it that Jerry Lawler referenced Frank Frazetta when describing Hunter’s attire.
8. That is a lot of people chanting “YES! YES! YES!”
9. Stephanie, that necklace/tie/choker thing doesn’t work for you, and your outfit is just a little…street-walker for a corporate executive.
10. Hunter did a good job of putting over Daniel Bryan. He made him look very good without looking weak himself. And *that* is what’s best for business. Excellent match. And the extra-curricular activities after the bell will only make Bryan a more sympathetic character for the main event.
11. Very disappointing match from the Old Age Outlaws and Kane. No introduction from the Road Dogg. The only offense from the Corporate team was the few punches Kane threw to start the match. I don’t know what I expected, but it wasn’t a squash. This is the worst I’ve seen the Outlaws look. Ever. I admit, the double-triple powerbomb was impressive. But that was a huge letdown.
12. Nice cameos from Duggan, Slaughter, Steamboat, the Million Dollar Man, and Ron Simmons. Quick and fun. Everybody has their price for the Million Dollar Man!
13. The Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal…what a mess!
14. KOFI!!! Always impressive. It’s a shame he never ends up winning, but he always has his moment in these battle royals.
15. A lot of impressive moments, but AdR kept eliminating people I like.
16. Cesaro v. Big Show to end it? HOLY CRAP!!!!! THAT WAS AWESOME!!! CESARO BODYSLAMMED BIG SHOW OVER THE TOP ROPE!!! DAYUM!!! WOW!
17. I don’t know if this cleared anything up from earlier, but Cesaro certainly got a pop from the crowd. WE…THE PEOPLE!!!
18. What an interesting band playing the entrance theme for the Wyatts.
19. Okay, I don’t get the whole “You can destroy my legacy by beating me once” thing. Kane couldn’t turn Cena, and I don’t expect Bray to be able to either. But I expect this to be a heck of a match.
20. Wyatt reminds me a lot of Bam Bam Bigelow in his athleticism, but with more than a touch of brutality. Oh, and that spider walk is downright creepy! He’s got potential we haven’t come anywhere near touching. FOLLOW…THE BUZZARDS!!!
21. The crowd is singing ‘He’s Got the Whole World in His Hands?” Wyatt is loving it. There’s nothing like a New Orleans party!
22. Cena’s a better man than I am. It was leaping into a powerbomb that broke his neck, but he keeps doing it.
23. That was a surprisingly good match. I do hope this isn’t over. The Wyatts bring out Cena’s best performances it seems.
24. Excellent Hall of Fame class this year. Jake the Snake, Mr. T, Paul Bearer (Ohhhhhh yeeeeeeees!), Carlos Colon, Lita, Razor Ramon, and the Ultimate Warrior! I half expected him to run down to the ring and shake the ropes!
25. Undertaker has the best entrance ever. No one compares. No one even comes close. Lesnar’s response? “Ho hum.” Lesnar looks almost sad.
26. Slow match, but Taker looks especially slow. I don’t know how this will play out, but he doesn’t look that good in-ring. I don’t know if this is ring rust or what, but he’s not at his best. He might be blown up already.
27. And Lesnar is looking beat up too. Taker may not be at his best, but Lesnar’s taken a few shots. Still, he looks like he’s selling, while Taker looks…old. Snake eyes looked like the snake was slithering through molasses.
28. F5!!! It’s over—NO!
29. HELL’S GATE!!! Wow. Lesnar is a beast!
30. AGAIN! And the same escape!
31. KIMURA LOCK!!! REVERSED!!! Lesnar to the ropes.
32. Old School. NO! Another F5!! TAKER KICKS OUT!!!
33. LAST RIDE! Oh, does the Undertaker look bad.
34. TOMBSTONE!!! THERE WE GO!!! 22 and…NO!!!
35. Tombstone reversed! F5!!! NO!!!
36. The Streak...is over. 21-1. Holy... O my... What the...
37. That was *not* what I thought I would see. Ever. The crowd reactions are priceless, and I know exactly what they're thinking, because I look like a poleaxed cow too. I never thought I would see that. Dayum.
38. Was that Taker’s last match? Is the lure of Michelle going to have him staying at home permanently? I really thought he’d retire after WMXXXI and a match with Sting. Could this be it, and Undertaker and Sting go into the Hall of Fame together next year? Thinking about it, I seem to remember hearing somewhere that the Undertaker wanted Lesnar to end the streak if anyone did, but…really?
39. I couldn't understand why they waited so long in the show to hold the divas match, but I guess they figured people would need time to recover from the Undertaker loss before the main event. Nevertheless, Viva La EMMAluton!
40. AJ retains! Ha! Any result that leaves Vicki with that kind of stinkface has to be good! That black widow submission is just awesome!
41. But the match itself? I would have been happy with half the participants rather than making all of them look weak by sitting on the floor for ten minutes.
42. Taker lost? What the... Maybe they probably should have given even more time to recover. Yikes. Not ready for the main event!
43. I’m not one for live performances, but “Voices” was better live than I expected, though I still prefer the studio version. I do wish they’d have brought Saliva in for “I Walk Alone”. Oh well.
44. No one has gone through the Spanish announce table yet. How can it be Wrestlemania?
45. Looking at the time, the match must be about half over, and the crowd is still quiet.
46. Excellent match so far. Especially the part where Hunter took a sledgehammer to the head for interfering with the crooked ref Armstrong.
47. There we go. Powerbomb and RKO simultaneously puts Orton and Bryan through the table. Ooooh, and Orton landed on a monitor. His back has nasty gashes. That’s legit right there. Wow. That had to hurt.
48. Shades of Mick Foley: Daniel Bryan fighting to get off the stretcher! There’s the crowd! The Taker hangover is gone.
49. Yes lock on Orton! Batista with the save. Yes lock on Batista! Orton with the save. Wow. Batista countering the RKO and then SPEARING Bryan. Orton RKOs Batista! Near fall. This is all coming fast and furious.
50. Orton to punt Batista. Bryan blocks with a flying knee! Batista gets rid of Bryan and then goes for the cover and Orton kicks out! Powerbomb on Orton.
51. YES LOCK ON BATISTA! ORTON IS OUT OF THE RING! BATISTA TAPS!!! BRYAN WINS!!! YES!!! YES!!! YES!!!

Very good show overall. The Shield v. The Authority match was disappointing, and I still can't believe the Undertaker lost. But the main even was worth the price of admission, especially since it came with the WWE Network.

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